You Can't Coach That

Saturday, May 17, 2008

It’s Saturday morning and the Coach family is in the middle of the normal helta skelta schedule (well actually I have been not doing all that much while my saint of a wife runs around like a mad woman).

One of the chores for the morning was a trip to the local butcher shop for the week’s supply of dead animal products. Being part of the cashless society the purchase was naturally completed with an electronic transaction via the credit card.

True to the adage, “haste makes waste” the credit card was hastily put away in the purse but didn’t quite make it into the appropriate slot and ended up on the butcher shop floor.

An hour later and the phone rings at home - it is the butcher. He has found the card, looked up our number in the phone book and called to report the so-far unmissed card. He indicated how worried he was knowing that my wife was flying inter-state tomorrow and the difficulties a lost card would cause.

Faith in humanity restored. A bottle of Australia’s finest red wine is on its way to the butcher shop.

“You can’t coach that”

Thursday, May 15, 2008

I was listening to my local radio station on the way home from work today and the announcers were discussing “the man chair”. You have probably seen the man chair but have you paid particular attention to it? You know the chair I am talking about, it can be found near the change rooms in most clothing shops catering for the fairer sex. What a godsend this simple piece of furniture can be. It offers a moment of respite in the marathon that is the shopping trip.

Of course the man chair concept could be improved on and taken to another level all together. How about some man-suitable magazines? Not necessarily the “I only read it for the articles” type magazines, but any form of sport or motoring magazine would do just fine.

Every man loves his TV and how good would it be to be able to watch the footy on a wide screen plasma while offering the occasional “that looks great honey” or “no your bum does not look big in that”. And of course there is no better chair to sit and watch TV than a leather recliner.

There is of course a huge downside to the improvement of the man chair concept. Credit cards all of the industrialised world would take an absolute beating. I know that my wife would have no incentive to leave a shop empty handed if I wasn’t impatiently shifting from foot to foot while staring intently at my watch.

“You can’t coach that”

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Whenever the issue of speed cameras on our roads is discussed the debate often centres around whether these devices are an effective way to save lives or whether speed reduction is just a by-product of the revenue raised for the government coffers. I am no expert in this area but I do find it interesting that speed cameras are often placed on what I would consider quite safe stretches of road.

Binge drinking amongst young people has everyones’ attention in Australia at the moment, especially excessive drinking by young women. As a high school teacher and father of two daughters, this is something that I find quite worrying and I applaud all efforts to deal with the problem. Of course my applause is louder for some initiatives than others. The government’s chief response at the moment appears to be an increase in taxes on pre-mixed drinks or so-called “alcopops”. Yes these drinks are marketed primarily at young women but does the government really think that an increase in the price of one type of alcohol product is going to significantly impact on the amount being consumed by these young people? There are numerous alternatives to these pre-mixed drinks and the teenagers I talk to support the argument that this measure will be ineffective in making them reconsider their drinking habits.

So what’s the common theme here? It is a win-win situation for the government. They can tell the electorate that they are getting tough on speeding and binge drinking. The evidence is there for all to see, splashed across every newspaper front page - too bad the evidence showing the effectiveness or otherwise of these programs is harder to find. At the same time, significant revenue is being raised regardless of the effectiveness of the initiatives themselves. And what happens to the revenue? It’s spent on roads and alcohol education of course - yeh right!

“You can’t coach that”