You Can't Coach That

Position Vacant - Blog Assistant

Wanted - One Blog Assistant.

Duties include reading dozens of interesting blogs, summarising the interesting and informative articles and drafting a series of witty and topical comments for my perusal and final approval. Suggestions for equally informative and interesting articles will also be expected.

The successful applicant will have the following qualities:

• The ability to read (at least until after the fourth drink of the day after which time allowances will be made)
• The ability to type with at least one finger.
• An excellent command of the Queen’s English (Swahili will also be spoken after the fourth drink of the day)

Physical characteristics are not important, however should you be interviewed on a day my wife is out of town, blonde hair, blue eyes and large breasts will be all that I will notice.

Renumeration will be based on a percentage of the advertising revenue generated here so it would be helpful if you were financially secure.

EDIT: Duties will include keeping up to date with numerous Technorati Favourite exchange programs

This sounds too good to be true. I’d like to apply!  :p

All applicants will be treated equally although the ones with large breasts will be treated more equally than others.

I don’t qualify Coach…I’m not a blonde

I’m blonde and i’ve got blue eyes. The only problem is that i wasn’t born with the intention of growing breast tissue.

This problem could be solved however, with the daily consumption of KFC.

“blonde hair, blue eyes and large breasts”
doesn’t look good on a bloke

http://goldcoaster.wordpress.com

Coach, let me know if this works - finding a big-breasted, blue-eyed blonde that is - I might try doing this as well.

As they say, “Variety is the spice of life!”

Mick: how about you help me screen applicants instead

goldcoaster: I guess we will have to see what effect the KFC has

comedy+: I’ll take a sense of humour over blonde hair any day

Jim: I tried the “variety is the spice of life” line with the boss of the house - predictable results, blogging from the spare room for a week

Hahaha. But variety is the spice of life!

The KFC eating is coming along, though i think my arteries will give before breasts start to form.

I’d love to help screen the application, especially if they are blonde, blue eyed and big breasts!

I’m sorry coach! I didn’t mean for you to get exiled. Look at it this way, at least you and the new assistant will have plenty of privacy.

I am a Rhodes scholar and a Kelly Brook look-alike

http://www.riscom.com/~none/pics/brook.jpg

except that I’m naturally blonde and blue-eyed.

I live in Europe.  Do I qualify?

Curious: let me know where to send the airfare